Parent Life · Uncategorized

The Visitor

Being a stay at home mum I enjoy the visitor more than ever. I went from seeing and speaking to people at least five days a week to speaking to a toddler about how good she is when she does poop poop. When I worked full time my weekends were a bit more precious, I was more selective how I spent my time. Now as a stay at home mum I can’t wait for the visitor to arrive. I was delighted last week when I received a text from my lovely friend Ray Ray who was home for a week, she selfishly moved to Spain, now I only see her a few times a year. I decided I’d go and collect her to get more time with her. It’s about an hour each way, that’s two extra hours of talking to an adult. Things are looking up, no Billy no mates in this house this weekend.

So to prepare for the visitor I pop to the shops for tasty food, tasty snacks and even tastier wine and presecco. I have to show them this is a great place to visit so they’ll come back. So with food and drinks in fridge, off I go. I turn up a few minutes late, don’t want to seem too desperate. The drive back, I can’t control my mouth, words just flow out like a waterfall. The visitor plays along and lets me ramble on and replies at the appropriate times. When we get back to the house it can mean on one thing for the stay at home mum, I hope Riley is happy to see the visitor and will in turn what attention from the visitor. This turns out to be the case, Riley is impressed by the arrival of the visitor and continues with her ritual of grabbing a book, handing book over and then backing up in to the visitor to be picked up, placed on lap and read to, result.  I see this as an opportunity, an opportunity to do things without Riley hanging off of my leg. At first it starts of small…can you mind Riley while I pop to the loo…all seems to go well. Riley and the visitor are happy in each other’s company. Hmmmm I need to make dinner, I ask the visitor…can you just mind Riley while I make dinner, again it went well. As a result of this I saw my chance to use the visitor at every opportunity to entertain Riley while I got on with other things. I know the visitor will be happy with this, all we want is for the child to like us, once that has been established I seize my chance for 24 hours of handing her over as much as possible.

 

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Now the visitor isn’t just here for the purpose of minding the child. Once the child is in bed we then begin eating and drinking and I continue to talk, I realise I only have a small window of talking time as the visitor will be leaving tomorrow so I go for it. As the stay at home mum you have to be aware of when you may be taking up too much time of the conversation and reign it in, after all you don’t want to scare the visitor off. I begin to ask questions about the visitor’s life and listen as they respond and comment in the appropriate place. Even though I haven’t had much experience of late in dealing with the visitor, I feel my communication skills are on point.  As I see the visitor becoming very tired I see I need to wrap this evening up, I suggest it’s time for bed, this pleases the visitor. I let the visitor know she will be receiving a lovely cooked breakfast in the morning, this seems to please the visitor. The next morning I again use the visitor to entertain Riley. I do this to make breakfast so I sense the visitor realises it is in her best interest to comply if she wants a meal. Breakfast is a success, the visitor appears satisfied. I then see another opportunity, a walk in the village with pram and dog, as a stay at home mum I usually do this alone, which can be difficult on occasion, the visitor agrees to help, lightening my burden. Once back I realise I need to bring the visitor home, the visit is over. I know I only have a car journey back for talking, I talk a lot, even at some points telling myself to stop, this does not seem to happen. I drop the visitor home and realise I will be back to days of poopy talk. This is ok though as I have had my fix and it will keep me going for a while. Overall this visitor has been a welcome relief.  The visitor has helped and been of use. Overall I will be letting this particular visitor visit again, if the visitor so chooses.

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